MyLaffs Joke #1858
There are these three guys in a desert dying of dehydration. Off on the horizon, they see a house and finally manage to struggle to it. The first guy goes up to the door to ask for water. This really old, wart-ridden, pus-covered, scaly, toothless old woman opens the door.
"C-c-c-can I h-h-h-have some w-w-w-water for me and m-my friends?" he croaked.
She replied, "I will let you have all the clear, crisp, cool water you can drink -- if you have sex with me."
The guy pukes all over the woman and runs back to his friends. "You guys would not believe who answered the door. Some really gross old lady," he tells them. "She said we could have water if I had sex with her."
"Why didn't you then?" asks the second guy.
"Because she was so ugly, I was sick, and couldn't do it," the first guy defended himself.
"Oh, you are such a pussy. I'll go up to the door," the second guy says.
He goes up to the door and rings the bell. The old hag answers. "W-w-w-w-w-w-waaaaaa......" He uses all of his willpower to not hurl. "Water? Yes, I have water,"
She says knowingly. "But you have to have sex with me first."
"AAAAAUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!" He runs back to his friends and before he could say a word, the third guy goes to the door and rings the bell.
"Please can we have some water?"
"You have to have sex with me."
Knowing that if he doesn't do something, he and his friends will all die. So he follows the lady into her kitchen.
"Do me here," she told him.
He sees three ears of corn on the counter and gets an idea. "Lay back and close your eyes. And keep them closed!"
The witch lays back and spreads her legs.
The guy nearly pukes after seeing this crusty cunt. He picks up an ear of corn and fucks her with it.
Finally, she cums. He throws
the corn out the window.
"Oh, God. That was the best orgasm of my life! If you do that again, I will give you a million dollars."
"Then lay back and close your eyes again." This she does and he does her with the second ear of corn until she cums again.
Then he throws it out the window.
This time she doesn't even open her eyes. "If you do that again, I will give you my Jeep so you and your friends can get the hell out of the desert."
"Eyes closed." Then he does her with the last piece of corn. He brings her to mind-blowing multiple orgasms. "Ohhhhhhhhh........ The water and money and Jeep are outside," she says, in the afterglow of ecstasy.
Meanwhile he tosses the corn out of the window.
So he runs like hell outside and grabs the water and money and jumps into the Jeep. He wonders where his friends are and drives around to find them.
He finds them by the kitchen window. One of the guys says to him, "Hey, man. I hope you had fun. We just ate the three best pieces of buttered corn you could have imagined."