MyLaffs Joke #1611
A FEW QUICKIES
Q: How do you tell if an Arkansas girl is old enough to marry?
A: Make her stand in a barrel. If her chin is over the top, she's old enough. If it isn't, cut the barrel down a bit.
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Q: How do you embarrass an archeologist?
A: Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.
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Q: What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend?
A: Wiped his ass.
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Q: How can you tell if your wife is dead?
A: The sex is the same but the dishes pile up.
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Q: Why are men like laxatives?
A: They irritate the shit out of you.
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Q: What do the gynecologist and the Domino's delivery man have in common?
A: They both get to smell the pie but neither one of them can eat it.
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Q: What is the difference between a lawyer and a rooster?
A: When a rooster wakes up in the morning, its primal urge is to cluck defiance.
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Q: What's the difference between a g-spot and a golf ball?
A: A man will spend 20 minutes looking for a golf ball.
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Q: Why do some people take an instant aversion to banjo players?
A: It saves time in the long run.
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Q: What do you call a Roman with hair between his teeth?
A: A Gladiator.
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Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag?
A: One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with.... the other is used to carry groceries.
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Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come in a bottle?
A: His wife died.
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Q: How can you tell if you're at a bulimic bachelor party?
A: The cake jumps out of the girl.
