THERE ARE DIETS AND THERE ARE DIETS!
* A diet is a weigh of life.
* It's something most of us do religiously: We eat what we want and pray we don't gain weight.
* A diet is what you go on when not only can't you fit into the store's dresses, you can't fit into the dressing room.
* One guideline applies to fat and thin people alike: If you're thin, don't eat fast. If you're fat, don't eat... fast.
* The problem with curbing our appetites is that most of us do it at the drive in window of McDonalds.
* The most fattening thing you can put in an ice cream sundae is a spoon.
* The biggest drawback to fasting for seven days is that it makes one weak.
* Above all, dieters are advised to avoid Pepsi, the pause that refleshes.
* Sweets are the destiny that shapes our ends.
* Diets are for people who are thick and tired of it.
* The toughest part of a diet isn't watching what you eat. It's watching what other people eat.
* Diets are for women who not only kept their girlish figure but doubled it.
* A diet is when you have to go to some length to change your width.
* It's not the minutes spent at the table that put on weight, it's the seconds.
* Many women reduce and reduce, yet still never manage to become a bargain.
* The best way to lose weight is by skipping... snacks and desert.
* Most people gain weight by having intimate dinners for two... alone.
* People go to Weight Watchers to learn their lessens.
* A diet is the modern-day meal in which a family counts its calories instead of its blessings.
