MyLaffs Joke #331
LAS VEGAS
There's lot of gambling locations all over the US, but I guess the grandfather of them all is still Las Vegas in Nevada. Some of the casinos there require you to wear a tie, even after you lose your shirt.
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Las Vegas is a wild and crazy town though. All kinds of gambling is everywhere. I parked to go get some lunch, put a quarter in the parking meter and lost my car.
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Keep your eyes out for crooked dice games though. In one shady out-of-the-way casino, I was watching one game for really big stakes. I got a little suspicious when the dice started leaving skid marks on the table.
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Las Vegas is also famous for its tall, shapely chorus girls. Due to the heat once, one of the girls fainted. It took six men to carry her out -- three abreast.
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Not sure if it was the tension or the alcohol, but I got some bad stomach cramps. I went to a local doctor and after a brief exam he said, "I'll give ya five to one it's an ulcer."
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You hear stories of people winning big at the slots in Las Vegas. Let me assure you that the only way 98% of the people are gonna beat those damn machines is with a very large hammer.
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Even the busboys in Las Vegas were better dressed than I was. And if ya check around, you'll find out why too -- just last week, they were customers.
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Still, all-in-all I'll probably return to Las Vegas some day. I was lucky actually. I understand half the population are former tourists who couldn't afford to leave.
